Wednesday, 20 July 2016


Today, I want to talk about the way society mounts pressure on people and the consequences these pressure has on the recipients. You see, not everyone's life is orchestrated the same way or meant to follow a particular pattern. It's totally wrong to create a time table for people on how their lives should go. Unfortunately, this is what our society has become, we do not mind our businesses and are quick to give out unsolicited advice or make certain unnecessary comments. There is a thin line between being concerned about a person's circumstance and being a complete nuisance. We need to take it easy, even though salt adds taste to meals, too much of it spoils the soup! These are some of the ways people are put under pressure:

1.PRESSURE ON TRYING TO CONCEIVE COUPLES: When people have been married for about a year, people begin to look at them expecting have had a baby or worst case be expecting one. Fine, having children is a thing of joy, but what if that's not the plan of the people involved? hello! after congratulating them and maybe buying a gift or two, you won't be the one paying the bills or having sleepless nights. What if God has a different plan for them? Some people are actually too insensitive to reason that these people could be going through a lot during this period and make comments like "Make una do make we come chop rice na" or say to the man "bros you do put this woman belle na" and so on. What if there's actually a problem somewhere and they are both trying to sail through it together, how do you expect them to feel when you say such things to them? How about praying for them in your closet instead of bombarding them with this comments everyday?

2.PRESSURE TO HAVE ANOTHER CHILD: Now you aren't completely free untill you have a second child, because people will start saying "Ah, now he or she needs a playmate oh" "Its time for another one". Its hilarious, but true. Really, are you contributing in anyway for childcare, or do you if they have projects they need to finish up with?

3.PRESSURE ON  SINGLE PEOPLE TO GET MARRIED: As a lady, as soon as you clock twenty-five or approaching thirty or a man in his thirties people begin to look at you a certain way. You can't be seen with a person of the opposite sex without people assuming that he or she is the one 'who is to come'. Different people start counselling you on why the set time to settle down is now, and all of these puts pressure on you to settle down with the next available person you meet.  People need time to make decisions on crucial matters like this and when you start prompting them this way, they tend to make serious mistakes.

4.PRESSURE TO HAVE A MALE CHILD: Just incase some of us have forgotten, female children are exactly what they are...Children! I have never seen a situation where a woman has all male children and panics, but I've seen one where a woman has all girls and is worried because she hasn't had a boy yet reason being that her husband won't have anyone to carry on his name, the fear that he might probably decide to have one out of wedlock, the fear that her inlaws would begin to disrespect her for not having at least a male child. You may be asking if this still happens in this twenty first century and the answer is yes! Some people are still too shallow in their thinking to understand that female children are doing exploits everywhere and could even give you more fulfillment that  a male child could. If you do not want your name to be forgotten, impact your generation, touch lives, that way, you will not be forgotten in a hurry.

Moral of the story? Let's try to be sensitive to what other people are going through. It is not everytime we should be opening our mouths, yes we mean well but sometimes silence is better. Allow people to live their lives with ease without wondering what people are thinking or saying. We are all guilty of these in one way or the other and we need to curtail it.  I used to be guilty of number 1 and 2 but an experience made me call myself to order. Which ones are you guilty of?


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